Wear the trousers means to be the one in charge in a family or a couple, the person who decides how things will be. The idiom is most often heard in the question who wears the trousers? This is the British version: Americans say wear the pants, but in British English pants means underwear. The idiom is jokey and old-fashioned, and it hints that the man is supposed to be in charge. In essays, use neutral wording: make the decisions or be in charge.
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wear the trousers (in + family/relationship/house); who wears the trousers; wear the pants (US)
- My dad jokes that Mum wears the trousers, but they actually decide everything together.
- In Kate and Sam's marriage, it's Kate who wears the trousers when it comes to money.
What changed
First versionEveryone knows it's his wife who wears trousers in that family.
RevisionEveryone knows it's his wife who wears the trousers in that family.
Without the, the phrase loses its figurative meaning and reads literally: his wife simply wears trousers. The idiom depends on the article: wear the trousers. Such a small word is easy to drop, and the correction adds only the.
To describe the other side of the relationship, the person who is controlled, English says under someone's thumb: He's completely under her thumb. Wear the trousers looks from the opposite side: it's about who gives the orders, not who follows them.
Your turn
Tom's wife chooses where they live, which car they buy and where they go on holiday. It's obvious who ___ in that house.
Show the answer
wears the trousers — Tom's wife makes all the big decisions, so she is the one in charge at home: she wears the trousers. Wears trousers without the simply describes what someone has on, but this sentence is about power in the family, not clothes.
Write about a family or couple from real life, a book or a TV series where it's clear who is in charge. Say who wears the trousers and what decision shows it.
In the series we watched last month, the grandmother clearly wears the trousers: she decides who will run the family farm.
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